The Bachelor – Des Moans

This is the first of two Bachelor blogs this week, but ABC doesn’t think 2 hours a week is enough torture. This week we have FIVE hours of BS to look forwardish to.

'So Chris, you're not good at talking'

‘So Chris, you’re not good at talking’

Chris Tells a bit

We got an hour a Chris not being able to fully form sentences about his feelings, quelle suprise. In this hour we also get Kelsey’s take on her being pretentious as hell (she didn’t notice), and Andi on her break-up with Josh (yikes).

Another Continuation

We were left with yet another cliffhanger ending last week after both Ashley and Kelsey were sent home after the two-on-one date. At the cocktail party, Chris and Megan have a chat, and they both decide that their relationship isn’t moving along like everyone else’s, and Megan left. Chris Harrison said that there would still be a rose ceremony, and Chris Soules was like ‘ummm screw that’, and the remaining 6 girls would be headed to the next destination.

What Chris never got to do in high school

What Chris never got to do in high school

On to Iowa

The women found out that they were heading to Chris’ home state of Iowa. This is something that isn’t normally done on the Bachelor. We rarely see where the lead comes from, but I think it’s a vital aspect of this season. Since Chris is adamant that he’s not leaving Iowa, it’s important for the women to see where they will be living. If they can’t see themselves there, then they better just get out now. Okay, enough of this serious talk.

For the first time in the history of the world, there are 6 people who are excited to go to Iowa.

Don’t be Jaded

The first one-on-one of the week goes to Jade. She finds out that she will be heading to see Chris where he lives in tiny Arlington. She sees the farm and his house before heading to downtown Arlington. You can tell my the look on her face that she’s a little shell-shocked about how little there is in the town.

They then head to the high school football team, and Jade is feeling a little more comfortable with the idea of an Iowan lifestyle.

Britt was rattled that Jade got this date and not her, because she wants to see where she would be living if Chris chose her. Jade also revealed to Carly her playboy past, which appears to be a central plot point in the next episode.

'Well, this place sucks'

‘Well, this place sucks’

Road Trip!

While Whitney and Chris go on their one-on-one date (which was too bland for me to write about, sorry) the rest of the girls made an impromptu trip to Arlington, they all decided they wanted to see Chris’ hometown too and took matters into their own hands. Britt put up a little resistance at first, then decided she should go. Like Jade, the rest of the girls were pretty shocked at how small Arlington was. Britt told Kaitlyn and Carly that there was no way she could ever there in a conversation not seen on camera.

Group Dating

We find out that Britt, Carly, and Kaitlyn are going on the group date this week, and Becca gets another one-on-one? Or maybe she just doesn’t get a date this week? I’m really confused at this editing. Anyway, Britt is mad she didn’t get to one-on-one date, and Carly reminds her that she’s being whiny and ends up with so much one-on-one time with Chris. They go skating, then Britt tells Chris they visited Arlington and how much she loooooooved it. Carly breaks the cardinal rule of not talking about other girls to tell Chris that Britt is full of shit.

How I feel about watching 5 hours of The Bachelor in one week

How I feel about watching 5 hours of The Bachelor in one week

During the second half of the date, Kaitlyn takes time with Chris to tell him she’s nervous about their relationship and Chris tells her that they’re solid, and gives her the group date rose to prove it to her. Britt was not happy with this, she loses it front of the other girls and tells Chris that she wants her future husband to look at her as their number one. This, understandably, made Carly and Kaitlyn feel like garbage, and Carly thinks this speech might have buried Britt.

Until Next Time

Again, we’re left without a rose ceremony at the end of this episode. And maybe another one-on-one? I legitimately have no idea. What I do know is 3/4 women who are moving on to the hometown dates in the next episode thanks to some hella spoilery previews.

Follow me on twitter, and check out the special recap podcast with Survivor’s Randy Bailey.

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